I make really stupid decisions sometimes.  The problem with me (or perhaps an amazing attribute), is that I’m great at justification, rationalization and twisting an idea just so, to fit what I need.  Typically, the fallout of being built this way just lands on me.  Ok ok and Anson too, as this super power also extends to arguments and the ability to twist things in a very nuanced way.  Back to my stupidity, though –  I had two situations come up recently that I think I might have blown.  They both involve leaving Roan unattended, not for a very long time, but still – unattended.

The first was a morning when I had a doctor’s appointment.  I needed just five extra minutes to get there on time.  Five minutes that ran smack into the time I’m dropping Roan off at school.  I asked him if he felt comfortable staying in the school yard without me.  He lit up like a fire and said, “YES!”  Roan is really excited about expanding any boundaries in his six-year-old life.  I’m pretty sure he’d move into his own place if we offered it.  So long as I was there to read books each night.  And cook.  And play video games.  So we walked to school together, and were around five minutes earlier than normal, and there was exactly nobody there.  The school yard was empty, there were no teachers.  I hesitated for a minute, and Roan said, “I’m fine, go!” I watched him mill around the yard for around 45 seconds, then ran like hell to get to my appointment.  Guilt plagued me.  What if…and what if….and what if….It wasn’t a great morning.  My friend Adam who is a champion Chops-Buster sent me this email, which I read in the doc’s office...

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