I Need to Apologize to My Spine

It seemed like such a good idea at the time.  Take my stepsons, Harrison, Reilly, and Reilly's friend Kyle, to Six Flags at Magic Mountain and ride the roller coasters with them.  I used to be quite the little roller coaster bad ass and I figured I could bond with my boys while traveling 100 m.p.h. in 3 seconds while strapped into a steel cage.

Never was I so wrong!  It was horrifying, terrifying, body jarring madness.  Plus, if I wanted to hear screaming and randomly smell puke all day I could of stayed home.

The rides at the park had names like The Viper, Batman, The Riddler's Revenge, Tatsu.

Those rides should've been called:

• The Spine Eater
  
  
• The Pre-Mature Ager from Intense Fear
  
  
• The Ass Clencher a.k.a. The Constipator
  
  
• The You Are No Longer 21
  
  
• The Bitch You Are Crazy and Too Old To Be On This Ride, Sit Your Ass Down With A Nice Book And Quit Torturing Yourself (I rode that one twice).

The boys on the other hand LOVED it.  They were determined to ride the rides for twelve hours (from open to close) and that is exactly what they did.  They were unphased through intense heat, hair ruining rides that soaked us in water from head to toe, rides that defied sanity and gravity.  When Kyle got nauseous and threw up after Batman and Reilly blacked out after Golliath the boys literally took a five minute break to "shake it off" only to get back on those roller coaster horses and ride again.

Meanwhile my ankles swelled, my skin crisped in the sun, my bra straps gave up the valiant fight of maintaining dignity, and my body begged to not travel at speeds over 55 m.p.h. along rails of track.

In the end though, we did bond.  There were super yummy iced lemonades and churros, we all got fake tattoos, took turns on the Oxygen Bar and decided we got ripped off by flavored air and the next day we still can't stop talking about our trip.

Next time we go to a theme park though, it is my turn to pick... here we come... Nap World.

Meggan Ravazzolo of www.meggansamom.com is an over educated – under medicated stay at home Mom and Stepmom in Northern California.  Meggan is a former graduate of the UCLA school of  Theater -Film -and Television, as well as a former comedian, actress, model, and television reporter with a flat stomach, perky breasts and good memory.  All that is gone now.  After a career in the spotlight Meggan traded in her microphone, size 6 body, personal pride and ego for a life as a stay at home Mom and Stepmom.  Her life has never been better, funnier, or messier.