Unnecessary Necessities: Five Baby Essentials You Don't Need

Walk into just about any store that sells baby gear and they'll be more than happy to hand you a barcode reader so you can run around building your baby registry.  They'll also give you a list of all the stuff you're going to need to properly care for your new infant.  As a new parent, this list can be overwhelming -- there is so much you need just to keep the little one alive, let alone raise them properly.  There are, however, a few big-ticket items that are considered necessities but really aren't.

As a father of three, I've been through the whole gamut of baby gear and have come up with a list of unnecessary necessities.  Not only are these items not necessary, most of them can be more trouble than they're worth.  Of course, everyone's situation is different and one man's annoyance is another's requirement for proper parenting.  Still, think about these before investing and consider whether or not you really need them.

Changing Table
We bought a combination changing table and dresser when my first son was born.  Seven years later, it's in exactly the same place my parents' changing table was -- in the hall, covered with stuff.  But, wait, you say, if you don't have a changing table, where are you going to address your baby's output?  Well, first off, let me advise you that it ought to be nowhere near your laptop.  Beyond that, it will be wherever you happen to be.  Most often, it will be on your bed or on the floor, but we've also dealt with diapers on the dining room table, on and in cars, on the bathroom counter, on the couch, and just about everywhere else.

While a dedicated changing table might seem like a good idea and is probably easier on your back than just about anywhere else, it's definitely not a necessity.  What you save by not buying one can cover the cost of an awful lot of massages -- and those benefit parents in more ways than just soothing a sore back.

High Chair
It's such a great picture -- Mom's in the kitchen cooking dinner while the baby sits happily in his high chair watching.  Later, Mom leans forward to feed him in the dining room as dad looks on proudly.  The truth of the matter is, however, that most of us don't live in palatial estates with lots of room to set up and store a large high chair.  But if you don't have a high chair, how are you going to feed the kid?  At first, Junior will be either breastfeeding (very awkward in a high chair, I imagine) or drinking from a bottle and doesn't really need to be sitting up at table height.  The best place, in my opinion, for this kind of feeding is in Mommy or Daddy's arms.
Once the kid gets to the point of being fed, start off with whatever baby seating you have handy -- a bouncer, activity saucer, car seat -- placed on the floor for safety, of course.  As the child reaches the point of wanting to self feed, a booster seat (with adequate support and straps) can be secured to a chair for feeding.  There's no need to try and find a place to store a chair whose spot is taken up by the high chair.

Bassinet
It seems like a bassinet is something every baby needs -- there's just no getting around it.  After all, you do need a place for your baby to sleep, don't you?  The thing is, though, that bassinets are really only good for the first three or four months of a baby's life -- once the child is able to roll over, a bassinet is no longer safe as the infant could fall out.  Still, however, the kid will surely sleep at some point during those first few months, won't he?  What is a parent, desperately in need of sleep, supposed to do?
We put our babies in our bed with us or, during the day, in the bed alone with pillows around the edge (in case she miraculously learns to roll over during her nap), but it seems this is now frowned upon as it may contribute to the possibility of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS).  Another option that we've used is to put the kid on the floor -- it's pretty hard to fall off the floor (although I've done it thanks to some Olde English 800).  The best solution, however, may just be to start off with the crib you'll eventually need anyway.  There's no reason not to put your newborn in a crib right from the git-go.

Baby Gates
I'm not a huge fan of baby-proofing homes -- I suspect that there are a lot of people out there who will see a few outlet covers and a baby gate as license to be less vigilant about watching their kids.  If, on the other hand, you know there are stairs right there with no gate to keep Junior from tumbling down them head first, you're going to be on constant watch.  That's important because not every place you take your child will be as safe as your home and even if you do your best, there may be dangers that you overlooked.  Bear in mind that you can plop a baby or toddler down in a room filled with all the best toys and they will invariably head directly for the one deadly item you missed.

In our house (a split-level home with stairs around every corner), gates have been more trouble than not, in most cases.  In an older home or when neither parent is particularly skilled at putting such things together, an improperly installed gate can be worse than none at all.  Gates that are difficult to get through may be left open or set aside to be as effective as not having a gate.  Now, we have used gates but mostly in place of doors.  When it came to the stairs, we just watched the kids diligently and, for our youngest, hoped he was okay as the older two taught him how to stair surf.

Diaper Bag
When our first son was born, we picked up a really nice Eddie Bauer diaper bag and matching bottle bag.  They cost a pretty penny, I'm sure.  Since then, Skip*Hop and other designer diaper bags have become very popular and each comes with its own high price.  But are those fancy bags really all that necessary?  Based on our experiences, the answer is no.
For our last two kids, we've simply used an old backpack, left over from my college days, to hold whatever we might need.  In the car, a few diapers, a package of wipes, and an inexpensive changing pad packed in a plastic bag means each vehicle is ready to go at any time; we don't have to worry about remembering to bring the diaper bag.

When you're shopping for baby gear, think twice about whether or not you really need each item.  You may come to the conclusion that you don't need everything everyone says you do and save yourself a lot of money in the process.

Uncle Roger blogs at Uncle Roger's Notebooks of Daily Life.