Am I Turning Into My Mother?

Ewgwergjhvw

Thu, 2010-03-04 09:40

I can only hope that I am turning into my mom. she is the most wonderful person i know. she is honest and strait forward. if you ask her" do i look fat in this". instead of letting you walk down the street thinking you look good. she will tell you "yes". it may hurt ur feelings at the time, but in the end it was all for the best. She taught me how to cook, do my laundry and watch my manners. My brother and i were shown how to be independent children growing up. My dad worked from 6 am to 7 pm mon-sat and my mom worked from 7 am - 4:30 pm mon-fri. when we got old enough to want the piercings and phone and expensive clothes, we got jobs and bought them our selves. Nike didnt even come into our lives until we were adults buying them for our kids. I catch myself saying the same phrases to my kids that i SWORE i would NEVER say to them! I said i would never spank them, or even slap them for backtalking. but if my mom hadnt done those things to me or for me rather. i dont think i would be the mother i am today! she gave me all i have to give to my kids.

realizing this came late in life, but the saying goes..."better late then never." My parents did the best they could. gave us all the necessities, and then some. she was team mom for my brother for YEARS, always there when we had school activities(plays, and so forth). both of my parents were always involved in our schooling. they didnt buy us cars, they gave us moral and survival methods to make it thru life.

I wouldnt change what my parents did for 1 minute! My husband in many ways reminds me of my dad. he is always there to make sure we have food, a home, and clothes on our backs! with this beings said.... YES. i think i am becoming my parents! not just my mom!

Fri, 2009-05-08 19:39

It continues to surprise me when I pull a Mom-ism.... something that my mom did when I was a kid that I do to my own kids.

What I've come to realize about parenting is that my mom did the best she could. She was really great in some ways, and failed in other ways. Like everyone, she had strengths and weaknesses. I am the same way as a parent- there are things that I know I am good at, and things I know I am not good at. It's nice to have a "fallback" when I am not sure what I am doing or I am in over my head. My mom's version of parenting is my "congingency plan."

Overall, I think I parent mostly from my gut, with specific things that I do or avoid, based on how my mom did her job. But when I am faced with a new or unusal parenting situation, I often find that what is there in the core of me has a lot to do with how my mom raised me. So she shines through in those moments.

A final thought- as I grow older, I have come to appreciate how wise my mother was and is- wise beyond her years. So even though she has her failings, I know that those Mom-isms are never going to lead me astray in my parenting.

Fri, 2008-12-19 19:57

I definitely think that I'm becoming my mother - and as I age, I've noticed that I'm now starting to look like her too.

Over the years, as I look back on things, I've come to the realization that I was always a bit like her in the way I did things. Which only means to me that I'm not the 'better parent' that I was trying to be.

Thu, 2008-12-18 06:54

I think Rebecca hit it on the head: you'll never fully understand your parents until you become a parent yourself. You may be full of empathy or you may be horrified, but either way you'll gain new insight into who they are and why they do what they do.

Wed, 2008-12-17 22:29

My mom is kick-ass.

After my parents divorced she raised my brother and I by herself. She even bought my dad out of the house and one of the cars - not an easy feat for her at the time - but she knew she had to do it. Even as a preteen I admired her for that. I also loved the fact that she was nothing like a Mrs. Brady mom. She was just cool. Tough as nails.

Now she's an awesome mother-in-law and grandma. As soon as I had my daughter I knew I would be just like my mom. I'm not a stay-at-home, bake cookies, PTA kinda mom. I'm nontraditional all the way. Just like her.

Tracy
http://themoxiereport.blogspot.com

Wed, 2008-12-17 13:00

I love my parents. I have to say that my Momma is my ROCK. She is solid. I found this out when my Father passed away suddenly 4 years ago. He was golfing at the local golf course and I heard the ambulance go by my house 30 seconds after I got the phone call from my Momma that he had had a stroke. I followed the ambulance to the hospital. My sisters and I have had a few problems, but this woman, Patti Medlin Pafford; has stayed so strong. Now, to the negative. She's a bit judgemental. Just like all good Southern Women. She's a gossiper. She nags at me about how my kids are dressed. Etiquite (sp). Every Holiday, we remind our kids to say, "Thank you, I love it." NO MATTER WHAT. So, yeah.... In that aspect. I'm the total opposite of my Momma. I let the kids dress themselves.
Love to all, and Don't ever be the first to let go of a hug. ButtMom

Wed, 2008-12-17 08:57

Eh, my mom wasn't really around much when I was a kid even though she was a single mother. My grandparents pretty much raised me. My mom was very demanding but also gave me tons of freedom when I was a child but turned ridiculously strict when I was a teenager.

It was really unbalanced.

I think the fact that my children have both a mother and a father will result in a vastly different childhood than the one I grew up with.

Wed, 2008-12-17 08:31

I'm with Giyen. My folks were (are) a mess. "Don't bother nursing. It's just inconvenient and ugly...I did it for 2 days, more than enough." ..."Don't pick up that screaming baby. Don't let it CONTROL YOUR LIFE!!!" Lol. I'm living the exact opposite. Happily.

Wed, 2008-12-17 06:46