Does anyone have any recommendations about where to shop online to make your kid look cute and stylish but still age appropriate? what are some of the sites you use??

I have to agree with everyone else especially about the Bratz dolls. Those things are really offensive. I'm not a prude by any means, I can put on a little sexy black dress for a night out with my guy but I would never wear something like that to the grocery store. Living in California I see it all the time too. Some of the women are nutty here and they have little mini me's following right behind them dressed just as offensively. I have gone so far as to ban any clothes that have the word princess or juicy for my daughter. Grandma thought it would be cute for her to have a juicy sweatsuit but I shot it down. Why would I want to have the word juicy written across my daughters behind, it's like inviting a child molester to come on over. A one year old does not need to have attention drawn to her rear end. My daughter has one "mini" skirt and it comes down to her knees, anything shorter and she's not allowed to wear it.

OMG Carita! I am with you on the Bratz Doll thing. I really don't know how they have survived this long. WHY ARE PEOPLE BUYING THEM FOR LITTLE GIRLS?! And what really kills me is when I find my nine and six-year-old neices playing Bratz, and they are saying things like, "Hey Sascha, are you, like, seriously going to wear THAT to the mall?" WTF?! I know they probably finish the episodes with some lame afterschool special-like lovely message, but that doesn't erase all the other exceptionally WRONG messages they are putting out there before that. The clothing alone is despicable. You know what else, I totally agree with Tracey Yule also. Take my sister and I as an example. We were compared our entire lives. Our mother, older sister, their friends and our relatives would talk openly in front of and to us about how I was the skinny, pretty one, and how she was the one with personality. Now, I was shy and well-behaved, while she was very outspoken and vibrant. I was one of those naturally ridiculously skinny kids of average height, while my sister was tall for her age and probably a tiny tiny bit bigger than me. That people felt the need to compare us so blatantly just makes me so angry. We both recognise now that this did us no favours. I grew up believing I would really have to pull a rabbit out of a hat to make anyone value me for anything more than my looks, and my sister grew up believing she was fat and not very pretty. Neither of those ideas were anywhere near reality. My sister is incredibly beautiful and always has been, and I'm a magazine editor now, and I'm a very confident person having used the talents I always had to get me to where I am today. Telling a child she/he is beautiful is fine. "You look pretty today" is fine to say, but please everyone, don't press upon your child/ren that their looks define them.

I wrote about this on my blog earlier this month. I was SHOCKED to find some of the costumes for tweens....in girls size 10?!?!!?! http://onenerveleft.blogspot.com/2009/10/its-because-im-old-isnt-it.html Any girl who chose to dress like this and whose parents let her assuredly froze her ass off last night! Deservedly so. Pain is "beauty" is a lesson one must learn early, right? ;)

I saw g-strings for 8 year olds. 8 year olds! Who on Earth would buy a g-string for an 8 year old? Disgusted.

I am so embarrassed to say this, but back in the day, I wore words on my butt. I know, I should be shunned. I understand if you never want to speak to me again :-) My daughter will NOT wear wordy-booty pants. Nor will she wear those cheeky, innuendo shirts that say things like "I'm a Tease" or "I've been naughty today"... can you even believe they make those for young girls? I do allow conservative tank tops and spaghetti straps. They've not low cut and they don't show tummies. In the dead of summer, I think it's OK to go without sleeves. What I'm battling right now, is that my two year old, is obsessed with jewelry and can not leave the house without her purse. I'm not a girly, girl at all, so I have no idea where this "go fetch my jewels" attitude came from. It's cute and funny and all girls like to dress up, but I don't want it to turn into a materialistic, makeup wearing, accessory obsession.

I'm glad this came up again as I feel so strongly about the topic. I made similar comments and posted the same link in "Halloween Costumes Gone too far?" but I'll say again that you need only show me a Bratz doll to get me on my soap box. As wonderful as the world is, there is still that percentage of sick individuals who could care less about our children and their innocence. There are those who only need to see skin and lipstick to consider a girl a grown-up. Society has changed A LOT, and this isn't just about being a crotchety parent who doesn't approve- it's downright dangerous in this day and age to take those kinds of risks with children. There is simply no excuse for "sexy children", and I don't feel that enough people are able to recognize some of the lines that have been crossed. Women make informed choices when they 'get sexy'. Little girls love to copy the behavior but have no idea what it implies, or the kinds of feelings those behaviors can produce in men/boys. Several people have commented on how manufacturers won't continue to make what we won't buy. It's serious, and it would be great for more parents to get together on the issue. Maybe then they'd listen. Once again, here is my tirade on this issue (I once got really upset about baby high heels and it sprang from there. I know they were meant to be cute but...). http://judgementalzine.com/index.php/2009/03/sex-candy/ Basically my answer is yes- much much too sexy. Some things I've seen make me want to lock my daughter away until she's 30....37. 43.

I first ran into this problem when my now nine year old daughter was 2. I could not find dress shoes that DID NOT HAVE HEELS. . . . The shoes were insane. There is only one reason for heels of any kind and that is to make your legs and butt all nice and popped up. I'm almost 6ft tall, so I don't wear heals anyway, but it's one of my HUGEST pet peeves. I'm the mom who bought Robeez shoes just to keep Ripley's socks on (those kinds of shoes, the leather slipper type shoes, strong enough to play outside in, but all soft and stuff weren't very common yet when Ripley was still small) and I had a daughter who started walking at nine months. Who the HELL buys heeled shoes (and yes, I mean the wide heel, but I think even half an inch is too much for a toddler) for a toddler-pre-schooler? And then...oh MAN. Ripley is tall, with a long waist, like I am. So all these jeans that fit around the hips and shirts that were not long enough...yeah. She wore alot of overalls, let me tell you. And I am buying boys clothes for her and have been for several years, and I will continue to do so until they don't fit her right anymore. She knows it, and in general she likes the boys pants more than the girls pants. She loves cargo jeans and shorts and camouflage. But she's also a girly girl. I've been able to find sturdy Mary Jane shoes with a good sole for the past few years as well as a dress boot with the same sort of sole. They're meant to be worn and played in, not minced about in. But I'm about to start hitting the wall again because Ripley's feet, overnight have widened so much that she can't wear her socks anymore. And she is NINE and wearing a size SEVEN in womens shoes. I have to re-fit her entire sock collection, including the MASSIVE PowerPuff Girl collection of socks. A dollar store was selling them, from Cartoon Network at the same time Ripley discovered them and became obsessed. Come to think of it, the same thing happened with Teletubbies. Praise dollar stores and thrift stores!! Anyway. Boys shirts are made bigger and longer, and I now buy Ripley womens sized shirts alot because she is in XL in kids shirts. I have to buy bigger than she is because she is so long. And don't even get me started on swimsuits. I could not believe the one piece suits they were putting out for her size. They were worse than the two piece ones, AND they were too short in the waist. I had the same problem at her age, in fact I had the same problem so hard that I REMEMBER my swimsuit from that age. They didn't start making tank-inies until I was a teenager, and at about the same time, Lands End started offering long torso one piece suits. It's bad enough when you have a kidlet who is not easily sized, to find clothes that are well made, tasteful and kid-friendly. It's alot harder when you have to sift through all the prosti-tot clothes to find ANYTHING appropriate. One reason we decided to homeschool was that we wanted our child or children to stay the ages they are as long as possible. That doesn't mean isolating them from other kids, but keeping them out of a place where they spend 7 or so hours a day under the influence of peer pressure works for us. And for the other moms and Dads I see at homeschooling functions. Kids need to be kids before they can become adults. Pushing them too far too fast and robbing them of that age where they're kids is just...well it's asking for trouble IMO.

I agree with Tracie Yule that I want my daughter (6yo) to find value in who she is rather than what she can show off. So yeah, she may grow more independent and make her own clothing choices at some point, but I hope I succeed in instilling the value that beauty does not equal slutty, and that this will help guide her clothing choices even when I'm not involved. http://www.babysaur.com