It should be an equal childcare partnership, so why do some moms get nervous when dad is left alone with the kids? Is it a control issue? Do mothers objectively take better care of children? Or are moms afraid that their kids will return home like this? Whatever the reason, Daphne Brogdon of Cool Mom would like to know, "Are you nervous to leave your children in the care of dad?"  Guest panelist Kierna Mayo, Big Kid Buzz Editor of CafeMom, joins the conversation.

 

 

Do you trust your partner to watch the kids?  Do you get mad if he doesn't follow "your rules?" Or is having dad watch the kids a great help and luxury (girls' night out!)?  And what about "Mr. Mom?"  Is dad your children's primary caregiver?  Join the Momversation by commenting.

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Showing the Latest of 20 Comments

ali
1 years ago
I'm terrified of leaving the kids with their dad. I often come home to the house trashed, the kids filthy and passed out in front of the tv with food everywhere and Dad not paying attention to anything but his beloved world of warcraft. But to be fair, it's kind of the same result when I'm home with them on an off day, like when i'm sick
 
MommyAnne
1 years ago
My son is three-months and I am terrified to leave him alone with his dad. Part of it is that I think I am too controlling but the other part is that he doesn't know how to calm him down when he starts crying. Every time I leave to go get groceries or need to run an errand, I always get a call asking when I will get home with the baby crying in the background. And of course, as soon as I walk through the door, daddy looks tired, upset, angry, frustrated. I am not really sure what to do. I try to teach him or help him feel comfortable in soothing our son but it doesn't seem to work. His confidence level is just really low. Suggestions?
 
mama007
1 years ago
Your husband is probably in a bad grumpy mood after watching the kid on his own because he does not know how to deal with her on his own. I was in the same boat: Greg is a loving father and husband, but every time I had to leave him with our baby, he’d be exhausted after an hour! Exhausted = cranky = moody = grumpy. The only solution here is to “guide” him through: let him learn by watching you and CONTINUE to leave him with the kid on a regular basis, that’s how he will learn. After all, practice makes perfect. Yes, it was very difficult for me to leave, hearing her cry while my husband was changing her diaper with a stern face. Slowly (and yes, after quite a few arguments and tears) he learned to talk to her, sing to her. He learned that babies need talking to even though they cannot talk back yet. And all that I had to explain to him. So what it takes is patience. At times I still feel like I have two kids to teach: one how to walk and talk and the other one how to deal with babies.
 
northerngurl
1 years ago
My kids are older now, but I was never stressed when their Dad watched them...he's their Dad and completely capable. I was just happy to get out the door.
 
baby blues
1 years ago
i love this!!.. i have two daughters... one is 21 months and the other is 9 months (and still breastfeeding) i have on occasion left one or both of my daughters with my other half but every time i do.. i know i'm coming home to a miserable house!! i'm very scheduled and he's not... the only thing he always remembers is nap time.. why?? because it gives him a break!! what does he feed them?? the older one gets random snacks.. the younger one.. (he conveniently forgets she does eat food so) he rings down my phone to tell me she won't stop crying and i NEED to come home.. funny.. i don't think so.. i can't even shower without having them take over our house.. this drives me crazy.. i can't leave them with him ever!! grandma does a better job.. i don't know if he plays the i'm an idiot and a child myself card purposely or if that's how he really is..
 
yumyumeatemup
1 years ago
I think it depends on the type of man you're married to. If your man is a hands on father and in control of his own life then you need not give thought over to it. For a peek at how we get on check out: http://www.yumyum-eatemup.com
 
Outnumbered
1 years ago
Hey everyone. Really enjoying the interaction on the site. Great peeps indeed. Check out my piece in reaction to the Hubby watching the kids video above. Enjoy and feel free to comment on the site... http://www.outnumberedonline.com/2009/04/youre-god-damn-right-you-should... Jay
 
Asianmommy
1 years ago
I love when my husband watches the kids. They love spending time with him, and it's nice for me to have some time to myself. That said, I'll never forget the time he said that he brought our daughter to her ballet class with her tights on the outside of her leotard. He didn't realize that the tights go on inside the leotard until he got to class & saw that no one else was dressed the way she was! :)
 
pjmullen
1 years ago
I'm a SAHD, so, usually I'm the one stressing out over nap schedules. Our son is eleven months old and I've been home along with him since he was three months old. My wife actually comes to me for advice about what our son needs. She is an amazing mother, but just because of our situation I am the one that handles things with him and around the house. Obviously our situation is very much in the minority. Also, to oneandonly_erin, thank you. Dads don't babysit, we parent. Whether we are stay at home, work at home or work outside of the home. I get that all the time when I'm out running errands. "Oh, are you giving mommy a break and babysitting today?" I just smile and say "yes", it generally isn't worth my time trying to explain things.
 
LiseAnn
1 years ago

 

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