I am a single parent with absolute 100% custody of my son. I don't have anyone to split the load with as far as seeing to Kaleb and his daily needs. I feel that in order to be a good (and totally sane) mom to him, I need to have some time to myself. That could mean going to Starbucks with a book and sitting for an hour, going out to dinner with friends, or even just enjoying a bubble bath in peace and quiet. With the exception of weekends, he is in bed at 8 every night. That way, I have at least two hours to myself before going to bed. Most of the time I spend those hours cleaning and getting ready for the next day, blogging or just sitting in bed reading. But it's nice to get that time to myself to do what I want without having to be in "mommy-mode".

I'm sorry but I was not being harsh, it's called being honest. Are we really helping anyone by blowing smoke up their asses? There's NO excuse to have that tree up and have time to made the video, then complain you don't have anytime. Seriously all the time you women take to twitter, moversation, blog, facebook, and all the other things you have going and then you wonder why you don't have any free time? Really? Turn off the computer, go to the park with your kids, put down the camera to take pictures to share with the Internet and viola--Time.

This is one of the only good things about being divorced and having joint custody: I have plenty of free time. Also, my fiance is wonderful about watching L if I want to do something when she's with me. I have a lot of hobbies. I'm an avid salsa dancer, and go to the clubs at least once a week. In the summer, I'm on my bike a lot. I do some volunteer work. I go to the gym, and on the weekends take extra time in the steam room. S and I go on a couple of dates a month, and we're not shy about getting a sitter. Luckily, his son is 11 1/2 and is going to take the ARC babysitting class soon, so we can start leaving them home together for short times. When I was married to her dad, my only outlet was going grocery shopping. He made me feel like a bad mommy--forget made me feel, he told me I was a lousy mother--if I so much as went out to coffee with a friend. It took me a long time to reclaim myself. I remember filling out my match.com profile when I started dating again, and only coming up with scrapbooking and reading as things I liked to do. Oh, and masturbate, because that was all the action I was getting. Who wanted to date a chick like me? So, I cultivated new interests and now I have more than I have time for. I grew up with a mom who was a martyr for her children. Everything she did in her free time revolved around us kids. I don't fault her for that, but I feel bad for her. I love my free time, and I don't feel guilty about taking it when I need it. It keeps me happy and sane, and makes me a better mom.

For Moscowmom - I have gone days without a shower,Many days. I have seen my husband take two and three showers in one day not even realizing he was taking for granted what I wanted most. I think moms all over the world sacrifice. I don't take time for myself because my husband works 70 hours a week and I feel guilty asking for some time. Instead, I wait for him to offer it to me, but he doesn't because he would just ask for time if he needed it, so he expects me to ask. When I do ask, when I think he has had enough rest, he totally supports me and I can tell he wonders why I don't ask more often. I think mom-guilt has a lot to do with it. We just don't feel right about doing things for ourselves when others, like the dog (Asha), need things too. I still have a 2 yr old and a 4 yr old and going to the bathroom is hardly ever a one-woman experience. I have had the talk with my six year old, though, and I think she finally gets it. Mom likes to poop alone! Kellie

Wow Patsy, that's a bit harsh and actually kind of ironic given the topic of this Momversation. God forbid Michelle take some time out to do something she might like to do rather than making sure all the house work is done!

I'm sorry but the woman with the Christmas tree behind her. If you took the time to make this video there's NO excuse why you can't find time to take down the tree. Put down the camera and take down the tree. I understand trying to find time for myself as a working mother. But I will tell you that a lot of the mommybloggers should log off once in a while, you'd be AMAZED how much time you have.

Asha: I can SO hear you about the dog. Somehow, I find 45 mins - 1 hour EVERY DAY to walk her (granted, every other day I have my 7.5 month old in tow). But never, ever have I been so religious about carving out that amount of time for myself everyday. I'd like to believe that I am high on my own list. But, the reality is, the dog & her walks are higher. If I don't walk her however I do pay the price of having an over-excited dog on my hands, so that's extra incentive. Whereas if I leave myself off my list for the day, the immediate consequence is usually much more low key. Of course, the danger in that is it builds until you end up having a serious meltdown. I must admit, since DS was born, my definition of 'me' time has definitely changed (hopefully only temporarily). 20 minute shower with Eucalyptus oil? Oh yeah, that counts (equivalent to a week in Jamaica as a friend of mine said). Grocery store...alone. Oh yeah. Actually, I love doing any errands alone now. You just feel so free. And even walking the dog alone. She gets to run around. I get to be outside, breathing fresh air, swinging both arms and thinking about anything other than what to schedule next and do I need to do ANOTHER load of laundry? I just declared to DH last weekend that if he wants to go the gym on Saturdays, then I get 2-3 hours of me time right before while he takes care of DS. What's fair is fair! Which reminds me...I need to book a facial for this Saturday. And, oh yeah, I read somewhere that saying you can't stop to find time for yourself is like saying you can't get gas because you need to keep driving. Um, yeah. Good point.