Early milestones can be something to be proud of , but yet they can be areas of concern. As the mother of a child with Asperger's I thought he was an amazing little person, but at times it concerned me. Dr's weren't concerned, so I let it go.I wasn't comfortable with the fact that my 14 month old child could form sentences using 4 words or that he finger painting art was exquisite for a 4 and 5 year old. I talked to Dr's but perhaps they thought I was gloating even though I insisted although proud, I'm equally as concerned. fast forward several years later and I am now the mother of a teenage boy with Asperger's. I have always tried to instill as much magic into my children's lives. You have to when your 5 year old approaches you with the question; "Mom is Santa for real?" I respond with, "What do you think?" He states, " I think it is theoretically impossible for one man to deliver millions of toys to millions of children across the world. It just isnt possible." I told him, "All I know is, if you dont believe you dont receive." So as you can tell I had to work very hard at trying to keep Christmas, Easter, Tooth Fairy, Etc., magic alive. We had a similar conversation regarding the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, etc., and about it being illegal to break into homes...... all from the complex mind of a 5 year old. even thought they are 12 and 15 I still decorate for every holiday with light, window clings and door hangings. I still dress up for Halloween and grateful that the boys do too. I don't think we could ever work hard enough at keeping our children as young as possible, for as long as possible. Childhood is gone in the blink of an eye.

Yeah

Such a great topic, and I so agree. You all sound like RIE moms. Every kid is different (all mine certainly are), and they develop according to their individual, natural schedules. When we rush ANY part of their development, we risk undermining the next. And for what? To impress the doctor? Good job!

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This episode was all over the place. It started with the idea of not rushing milestones, then turned into yet another discussion of competitive moms. Then the editors threw in Rebecca's bit about how we end up shielding adolescents from information about their sexuality. Huh? I wish the conversation would have actually discussed the topic it advertised, but then again, do we really need to discuss why it's important to be aware of our baby's development? Every parent should know that there are certain behaviors children should be able to display at different times. It's not being competitive, it's just being knowledgeable about child development, which all parents should be! We require early childhood educators to take courses in child development. Why is it so bad for parents to look at their six month old and make sure they're progressing appropriately? As far as rushing things is concerned, it looked as though the production of this episode was rushed! Better luck next time!

I have two kids, and so I find that now more than ever I am in no rush for my kids to grow up. Time is really flying by with my second, and it's making me a little sad. However, I will say that I have had moments of concern, where my kids were a little behind their peers. In those moments it's sometimes hard to keep perspective and NOT be anxious. Like right now, my 18-month-old has no words. He communicates and uses baby signs, but he doesn't have actual words. It's very hard to be totally zen about that, especially when I see kids his age speaking in sentences. I think the challenge as parents is to balance our natural concern for our children with a sense of perspective and knowledge that everyone has their own timeline.

@misscapatosta "Love this! I initially thought that it would be super fun to go through my pregnancy with a friend..who wouldn't? Right?" Oh dear...I went through the SAME thing! I'm no longer speaking to that friend. She was a newish person in my life...and when we went VERY different routes in terms of child rearing styles (breast vs. bottle, crib vs. cosleep) it was death to the new friendship. I hate it, I wanted so badly to have someone to talk to about all these things, but whenever I would comment on any we did that was different than her choices, she got defensive. We "split" before our babies could get big enough to reach any real milestones, but I could only imagine how talks about who did what first would go :-(

My biggest issue with Ripley's milestones came from other parents. Specifically other parents in our Gymboree class and at restaurant play places. I had no agenda for Ripley's milestones, but she apparently did. She doubled up on them and conveniently spaced them so they would be on holidays so that we could remember. She rolled over and sat unassisted the same day. (Okay I don't remember when that one was) Labor Day (she was born in Feb) She crawled and pulled herself to standing the same day. Thanksgiving: She took her first steps. She also climbed like a monkey on things designed for much older children. Consequently I got used to her falling and bumping and running into corners and the like. Which brings me to Gymboree class. If you've ever been to a Gymboree class you know it's designed to be safe for babies and toddlers to play. I cannot tell you how many times I had a very "concerned" mother come up and tell me something I knew perfectly well, that Ripley was "walking the balance beam, climbing the climber, playing on the round thing, ect...and always with the worried tone AND the "Shouldn't you stop her?" My response (which worked much better on the playplace parents) was that "Eh...she bounces." But it got to the point where I had to say to this one mother in particular, "LOOK. She's been walking since she was nine months. If I freaked out every time she wobbled or fell or took a tumble they would have had to lock me up in the nuthouse." And even THAT didn't satisfy her!! (Mind I had this issue with a couple of other moms too, that got to the "nuthouse" degree, but this one just took the cake) I finally did something I SWORE I would never do when she wouldn't leave it alone, and actually went to the person running the class. I looked her in the eye while the class director looked on (since she had no issues with Ripley's motor skills) and said, "Look, *insert name here* my first child DIED. Do you really think I would take undue risks with the health and life of my surviving daughter?" She never spoke to me again, thank all the gods. But I got SO much of parents asking me, "Should she do that? Is she allowed to do that? Can she do THAT?" I mean, I was proud as heck of her, but it was all HER and had nothing whatsoever to do with me. If I had my way she would have been in the sling until she was three.

Love this! I initially thought that it would be super fun to go through my pregnancy with a friend..who wouldn't? Right? Well, turns out that being pregnant with a friend who is due right around the same time you are, just adds fuel to the fire. How many pounds have you gained? Have you felt your baby kick? Did you already get the 3-D ultrasound? then the big day...How long was your labor? How much does your baby weigh... And on to now: Your baby already talks? Oh, and he's been walking for 3 months? The competition is exhausting. Ahhh. Let's call a truce. We both have adorable babies who are developing just fine. As long as they are both potty trained, walking and talking by kindergarden, I'd say we're good. Enough with the competitive milestones already! :-) Sarah (www.capatosta.wordpress.com)