The answer when I was 26 was yes. And I did. But we did not have children, and we were married about five years. I was told, at the time, that in New Jersey, it is just assumed that someone will have cheated when there's a divorce going on, so that is not even considered grounds for divorce. Fast forward to now. I am 38, and my (second) husband and I will be married ten years in November. We have a son who is now five and a half. I have told my husband repeatedly that one thing I will NOT tolerate is infidelity, and he knows what I went through before. But if it were to happen, I don't know how either of us would make it (financially) on our own. We could not stay in the area where we live now, and it would break my heart to see my son lose us as a parental unit. My husband is VERY involved in our son's life. How would I be able to keep that up if I could not stand the sight of him? I also believe that my husband would never want our son to view him as a man who cheated. I hold on to that hope. I guess I'll just need to remind him tomorrow (as it's 2:30 in the morning here as I type this) how important his fidelity is to me. Just in case.

It would depend heavily on the circumstances: whether it was a long-term thing, a series of different women, whether there was emotional involvement versus strictly physical, etc. You can't just throw away a marital relationship and turn your family upside down because of a widely-held, "one-size-fits-all" opinion about what should be done with a cheating spouse. It's got to be a personal decision based on the details: period. It just isn't a black-and-white issue. Cheating is never justified for ANY reason - but it helps if you can see the motivation and address it. People don't just cheat for cheating's sake ... it ultimately stems from some sort of unhappiness or dissatisfaction, and whether that unhappiness is based on some personal problem or marital discord, it needs to be dealt with if a marriage is to "bounce back" from the heartbreak of infidelity.

Any women who make the comments "it would never happen to me" are naive. Given the right circumstances, you never know what could happen. I used to say that exact thing, which has made it even harder to get over what my husband did. It was years ago and I still can't cope. (And do not ever ask for the details, you will never forget them and the cheater will.) I will never be the same and I am angry about what I lost - especially my peace of mind, trust, self-worth and self-esteem. Remember, this affair involved a man who said he would NEVER do that. It really is a passive-aggressive act. Our marriage sure was not perfect, we had four kids under the age of 7, the youngest just turned one at the time, which obviously was the focus of the family, and tiring and stressful on occasion. I had only recently stopped breast-feeding at that point. But I thought we were partners in raising our family. If he was not feeling loved or was not getting enough attention, it sure would've been nice for him to say something before he did what he did. He started asking me questions about how much I loved him and what I liked about him DURING his affair. You know that was a lose-lose situation for me. I could not answer the questions with the answers he wanted because I did not know what was really going on. She was "fun" and did "silly" things and left "cute" messages for him, etc. So cute that she was doing it right under her own husband's nose, too (she and her husband were our neighbors.) The other shocker is when that the "other woman" is usually so less attractive than you are and this one certainly lacked in the personality department, and that didn't even come into play. So I was supposed to be fun and loving and all those things he was supposedly missing, but it was okay for her to be trampy and say the most terrible things about her own husband. I have now raised my kids and it is time to move on. I should have left back then. I did not know that I was married to a child, I mistakenly thought he was a man.

There no way in HELL I would stay with my husband if he disrespected me like that. Tracy

Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes. I don't care if it's a one night drunken fling or a long term affair. I have a hard enough time trusting people that if there was THAT kind of a betrayal, I'd never be able to get past it.

I should preface this comment with the facts that I am in my twenties and childless, as these things seem to be important for many of you in the end result of the question, "Would you leave a cheating spouse?". Only time will tell if my opinion differs given the inevitable change of these facts. For me, divorce is (mostly) not an option and is in fact, my biggest fear. However, I do not believe that marriage, unlike loving your children, is unconditional. In my marriage, I have boundaries, very clear boundaries, about how I expect to be treated. Fidelity and respect for our marriage is one of those boundaries. Period. If he cheated, I am out. This is a boundary I have made very clear to him from day one. I will do absolutely whatever it takes to make my marriage work, short of him cheating on me or hitting/verbally abusing me. For me, the answer is very clear and not at all shades of gray. I know myself well enough to know that our marriage would never be the same. I could not work through the shattering of trust that would result from an infidelity. Nor could I stop myself from incessant questioning every time he is out of my sight, checking his phone, emails, etc. I am a definitely of the school, "Burn me once, it's your fault. Twice, it's mine." I agree with the above commenter, however, that this is the type of decision that is an individual choice. I sincerely respect whatever decision another person makes in this area.

Like many of you, it would totally depend on the circumstances of the dalliance. Was it a one-time thing or an ongoing affair? Purely physical with a near-stranger or an emotional attachment with someone we know well? And did he have the common sense and respect for me to at least use a freaking condom?! Also like several others have shared, I used to state firmly that infidelity on the part of my husband would mean a swift and final end to our marriage. But that was when I was much younger. Of course we didn't have children then so it wouldn't have been as difficult to dissolve the marriage and we didn't have their lives and well-being to consider. But I wonder also if our age doesn't have something to do with the change in our perspective. For myself at least, I know that when I was younger I was not as self-confident and more of my self-worth was wrapped up in my husband so it would have been more devastating to my ego if he had cheated. Now that I'm older, and hopefully wiser, I'm definitely more independent and don't feel like I need my husband or any other man to make me whole. So while it would absolutely hurt and be a terrible betrayal should he cheat on me, I wouldn't feel like it was a reflection on me as a woman or my self-worth. I think I would be better able to keep it in perspective in the "big picture" of our family's lives. Does that make any sense?? That being said, if it was a situation like Leslie described where he was screwing my best friend repeatedly, in my own house while I was sleeping upstairs? He'd be out the door so fast, he wouldn't have time to grab his hat!

I just love Karen! She is so fun to watch on Momversation, and great singing voice ;) Super topic ladies!

Without having been in that situation, it's hard to predict how I'd react. I heard an interview recently with a relationship therapist who said that when they counsel couples they're not necessarily always working towards a "stay together" scenario, but towards the best solution which in some cases might be going separate ways. I'd hope that there might be issues that if they were addressed would mean working towards staying together, if it happened to me. And on a completely different note, what is UP with the hipster snappy music in the background of the video? Anyone else driven completely bonkers by that or is it just me?