When Do You Know When to Wean?

Breastfeeding is a beautiful bonding time between baby and mama. But you can't breastfeed forever, so there comes a time when you must wean. But when is the best time for weaning? Is there a time limit, say 3 months? Should you wait until your child tells you she's done? And how long should the weaning process last? Rebecca Woolf of Girl's Gone Child asks, "When do you know it's time to wean?"

Do you have any weaning tips? Did you find it easy or difficult? And are you a Boob MacGyver? Watch the video to find out, and join the Momversation by commenting below.

Showing the Latest of 13 Comments

NJ_2_NorCal_Mom
2 yearss ago

My son was born three and a half weeks early. We had not even completed the childbirth class! So here comes this kid, having to spend his first eight days in the NICU, and me, up the hall, recovering from a c-section that ended up not healing right. Ugh, what a mess. We did the breastfeeding thing, but he was not exactly a champ at the latching. So I pumped. And I pumped. And I put the California dairy cows to shame, girls! I could pump for the US breast milk team. Since we were already in the NICU, I felt like they could go ahead and feed my breast milk to the tiny preemie triplets in there, I had so much extra. (They opted not to.) We finally got home, and I was up at night pumping and hubby was up at night feeding my milk to my son in bottles. Then I had to go back to work when he was only about six weeks old. And there was nowhere at work for me to pump in any kind of privacy. (pre-K through 8th grade school, so you really don't want to get barged in on in that setting.) So I had to stop. We gradually moved him over from breast milk to formula by changing the ratio over time (I had enough in storage to really stretch that out). I admit I was glad to have my normal boobs back, you know the ones who did not randomly shoot milk out when I really needed them not to.

nicnicnic
2 yearss ago

HOLY EFFING BOOBIGE MINDY!!!!!!! FANTASTICA!!!!! that seriously made me wet my pants. how incredible for you. and rebecca, still rockin it out at 11 months... and heather, absolutely LOVING it with your new sweet one. i'm green with envy. but it's cool. i'm glad it's worked out so well for others and it keeps me encouraged that my experience may be better, dare i say successful, with any future children. forget getting into the nitty-gritty of my breast-feeding experience... i'll just leave links to posts from my website to share my experience... ha!!! http://www.mybottlesup.com/colic http://www.mybottlesup.com/hospital http://www.mybottlesup.com/digestion-details-and-then-some

MeMyselfandMommy
2 yearss ago

Moanna and I had a very hard time breast feeding. It was something I was passionate about, so my frustration level was through the roof when it was so darn hard! It began with the fact that the hospital gave me a narcotic, did not ask for one! I asked for something to help me rest because I had worked 8 hours on my feet prior to my water breaking in the middle of the restaurant I worked at. I wanted to rest so I could have the energy to push. A antihistamine would have worked just fine! So Moanna (on top of being a tiny baby 5lbs 6.5oz) was born sleepy, so she didn't want to latch on and as soon as she did, she passed out. I pumped milk like a champ. I'm talking 10oz every two hours the day after she was born. We finger fed her until she started to stay awake at my boob. We finally got through that, when I got a severe case of mastitis (due to cracked nipples from the poor latch on). In one day I went from healthy pumping more milk than a dairy cow, to no milk. After that we got thrush. My milk supply also dropped to near nothing. I had no choice but to give her formula along with nursing. Moanna and I struggled for about 4 months before she and I were both like this is a waste of our time together. She was much happier, I was much happier. I'll admit, I started to really like her once she and I no longer spent hours crying together. I will do it again for my next child. This time I plan to go natural with the birth, and nurse immediately after the baby is born instead of waiting for the doctors to stop their poking and prodding. I think it is up to you and the baby when it is time to let the nursing go. Do what feels natural for the two of you. I will sheepishly say that it creeps me out when I see children walk up to their mom and demand to be fed. I just want to know what it is like to look back as an adult and have memories of your mom nursing you. I think it makes me squirmy because I don't know enough about breast feeding past about a year old. I'm totally open to learning about it

ladyofnomads
2 yearss ago

I'm in that exact same boat, francophoney, and I hope someday to be able to spend less than $70 on a bra that fits again, or to be able to sleep on my stomach without them hurting the whole next day, or do a pushup, for pete's sake. As far as when to wean, that's easy. If Mom's combined reasons for wanting to wean > the will to resist the amount of fight her particular little one is going to put up, then it's time. Which means if you find breastfeeding convenient and enjoyable or your babe refuses bottles or food or any number of other things, you may end up being a milk factory longer than you planned. I think the whole concept that there is an ideal time to wean for every child should just be thrown out the window because it is completely ridiculous. My son weaned at 14 months fairly easily, I'd say a couple of weeks. My daughter is now thirteen months and still nurses ALL NIGHT and at least 10 times a day.

francophoney
2 yearss ago

Am I the only one who is not particularly down with the BFing boobs? Because seriously, I have reached the eighth letter of the alphabet! THE EIGHTH! The eighth letter is for those whose job qualifications involve moaning! The midwife in the birthing classes informed us that many women's breasts end up smaller post-breastfeeding than they were pre-pregnancy. I am sending out smaller boob vibes to the universe, and really hoping it responds, but knowing my luck, I may have to consider a new profession...

AllThingsMamma
2 yearss ago

Breastfeeding is hard and it is even harder sometimes to know when to wean. I was lucky enough to have both my children self wean. #1 weaned at 10 months after we both got thrush. Was just too painful for us both and we both cried through nursing. One day I broke out the bottle and she took it like a pro and that was it! LOL #2 weaned at 13 months. I really thought I'd be nursing him until her went to preschool. He nursed around the clock every 2-4 hours until he weaned. Yes, that's right...1 yr old and still waking up every 2-4 hours. OH - I was miserably tired. He would bang his head off my chest when he wanted to eat and would make this panting sound. EVEN in Target. SO embarrassing! LOL One day he just started cutting back his feedings. (but not the night ones, of course!) One night at 4am when I tried to feed him, he pulled his head back and looked up at me like "hey lady...what are you trying to give me?!" And that was it! My advice would be to let your baby give you cues on when to cut back and to wean completely...but probably earlier than elementary school would be good!

bethybu84
2 yearss ago

When I got pregnant I knew I wanted to breastfeed my daughter. It was so much harder than I thought it was going to be. It took a long time to for us to get the hang of it. Eventually it became fairly enjoyable. I breastfed my daughter until she was 7 months old, then I slowly started weaning her gradually. It took about 2 months to completely wean her. I started feeling like I wanted my body back when she was around 6 months old. So I did some research on how to wean and asked my friends and family for their opinions. Everyone had an opinion. Talk about judgy! When I told my sister in law that I was probably going to do it gradually she thought I was a moron! She thought cold turkey was best, but I just didn't want to my kid or my boobs through that! It was a lot easier than I thought it was going to be. Every mom and child is different. You can tell someone what worked for you, but who knows if it will work for them.

bwankel
2 yearss ago

I wasn't sure I was going to breast feed or formula feed until my son came out, I held him to my chest and he latched on and ate like he'd been doing it for years. From that moment on, I was totally sure. And I LOVED it. At about 9 months, he dropped a bunch of feedings. Looking back, I know that's normal but at the time I was petrified he was self-weaning, and it had me all emotional and stuff. When he got to be a year old, that's when I was ready to wean. Something had changed in me, and I was ready to have my body back, as Rebecca said. He was eating a good variety of foods, I'd done my year of exclusive breastfeeding, he had started pulling my shirt up in public. I was done. Just done. I was afraid he would not take it well, but he took bottles of cow's milk just as naturally as he took to the breast. I think it was just time, for both of us. I hate to give that cliche answer that "you just know", but for us that's just the truth.

katieladyTX
2 yearss ago

Rebecca, you hit the nail on the head. People are so 'judgy' about this topic! We are pushed and pushed to breast feed, but then before your kid even turns ONE, people are looking at you and saying 'isn't he a little OLD to breast feed?' Once the baby hits a year, people are all up in arms about it. BREASTFEED YOUR BABY! (but only for a little while, otherwise it makes us all uncomfortable.) What the hell is that? Just reinforces why I hate people. Individual persons, yes. People, I'm not so fond of. I loved breastfeeding. Every single minute of it, even though it was really hard at first and kicked my ass. But I got over it and only quit just shy of 15 months because I got my THIRD mastitis infection and my hubby was about over it. I was only feeding twice a day at that point anyway, so it was easy to wean. Well, physically easy. Emotionally, not so much. Ironically, my son made it easy, as he was already taking cows milk for non-nursing sessions and was pretty much 'eh, this is fine Mama' with me. It was relieving and heart breaking at the same time. I think you just have to take cues from your child and do what's best for you. Like you said, every baby was different. I wasn't working after my son was born, but I will be with baby no 2 (whenever that happens) most likely, so I know I'll be pumping. And I HATE pumping with a passion, so I am sure that I'll wean the feedings that require me to pump as close to one year as I can get. But as we intend to only have one other child, meaning next time will be my LAST time, I might hang on to it longer than I did with my son. Although I'll probably draw the line if he/she starts asking for it out loud and/or tries to get under my shirt without my permission. ;)

geminimcm
2 yearss ago

Ok, first of all, I have to say that I LOVE this website. I just discovered it yesterday and am obsessed. All the videos are GREAT and it's wonderful to hear these opinions on topics that affect me greatly. I am a 28 y/o, working full time, married mom of 2 young boys, one who will be 4 years old next month and one who, like Rebecca's child, is 11 months old. I nursed my 1st son until 10 months old. My milk production went drastically downhill when he was 8 months old because he started sleeping through the night. I had fed him every 2 - 3 hours all night long up until then! Talk about no sleep. So once he started sleeping through the night, the feedings became less and less, until it was down to just one, and then nothing by 10 months. I in no way was trying to wean him, but it just worked out that way and he never once seemed to miss breastfeeding. It happened very naturally, thank the LORD. Now I am currently still nursing my 11 month old and pumping while I am at my full-time job (and have been since he was 4 months old)..and I am noticing my milk production starting to decrease, although I drink a TON of water, eat plenty, still nurse the same amount...so I'm not sure what is going on...but that is not my point. I can COMPLETELY relate to you, Rebecca! My goal from day one was to take nursing day by day, then week by week, and then when I made it to the 6 month mark, I was like "woohoo!!" Then my goal was 10 months like my 1st son, and now my goal is 1 year, which I will obviously make. I, too, have been wondering WHEN and HOW I will wean. I still nurse at 4 am, pump at 9 am, pump at 2 pm, and nurse at 7 pm, like clockwork, always. I'm not sure which feeding to cut out first. I think I am sad that this is my last baby and then I am done nursing forever! It makes me upset because I really enjoy it. This child has been a WONDERFUL nurser from the very first time (quite unlike my 1st son, in which we had to use a nipple shield the entire time). Mindy, you are a true hero! My God! To nurse that long is EXTREMELY commendable. That is some dedication, I must say. It is pretty much a full time job to nurse a baby, especially in the early stages. But unless you have nursed, you have NO IDEA how wondeful it can be. Michelle, I too, LOVE nursing this time around. LOVE it. So I am definitely not knowing when I will wean. My goal was 1 year, but now that it will be a year at the end of the month, I can't just go from 4 times a day to nothing. I also have the pressure from my family that 1 year is PLENTY old enough to stop nursing. They can't believe I have nursed past 6 months and they make me feel like a freak or something. Very frustrating. Love this site, love the videos, love you guys! Keep up the great work! I am learning so much and feeling sooo not alone.

When Do You Know When to Wean?

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